Behind the Scenes: Why Picture–Perfect Relationships on Social Media and TV Aren’t Realistic

You’re scrolling through social media and see another “perfect couple…”

Suddenly, you’re left wondering: Is my relationship good enough? Why am I still single?

It’s easy to get caught in the comparison trap. Social media and TV shows can make you think:

• “Am I good enough for someone else?”
• “Should I look more like that?”
• “Do I need a relationship to be happy?”
• “Is my relationship as perfect as theirs?”
• “Should I have sex with them to get them to like me more?”

Spoiler alert: Relationship photos aren’t the whole story – and comparing your life to theirs isn’t fair to you.

You’re Still Growing

That means emotions, decisions, and relationships are all part of the learning process. So, cut yourself some slack. You’re growing and learning, and that’s a good thing!

The problem? Social media, movies and TV shows can trick you into thinking you need to have everything figured out right now. But that’s not true. Don’t let a cute influencer couple or a scripted TV show make you feel like you’re falling behind.

Did you know your brain keeps developing into adulthood? Your brain isn’t fully developed until you’re in your mid-to-late 20s.

Social Media vs. Real Life

These couple goals posts: They’re just the highlights, not the full story. You don’t see the arguments, the messy days, or the awkward moments.

Social media makes it seem like love is only about big promposals, dreamy dates, and zero drama. Let’s be real, TV shows and movies aren’t much better. They make it seem like you have to be having sex to really connect with someone or get them to like you. This pressure to live up to the media’s portrayal of relationships is not ideal.

According to the PEW Research Center, about 40% of women feel less happy with their own relationship because of relationships they see on social media.

In real life, relationships are about trust, communication, and the little things—like laughing at inside jokes or being silly. Real love isn’t showing off online or doing anything you aren’t ready for – it’s about being with someone who respects you.

Stop Comparing Yourself

Comparing yourself or your relationship to someone else’s on social media won’t help you feel better. Even if you feel “better” than others in some ways, comparison still messes with your head. Everyone’s dealing with their own stuff, their own timeline, their own highs and lows.

When you compare, it lowers your self-esteem and can make you feel like your relationship (or single life) isn’t good enough. If you’re in a relationship, it can make your partner feel like they’re not living up to the social media version of love. You don’t want that.

So, next time you’re scrolling and feel bad, remember to:

• Pause: Remind yourself that social media is not real life. People post what they want you to see, not the whole truth.
• Reflect: Focus on what you want out of a relationship, not what is trending.

What three things do you like about your relationship or want in a future relationship?

What Makes a Healthy Relationship Anyway?

Real talk: No relationship is built on picture-perfect dates or matching outfits. What really matters is the connection you share with someone. Do you trust them? Can you communicate openly without feeling judged? Are you able to be yourselves?

Healthy relationships are about mutual respect, being able to work through differences, and supporting each other in good times and bad. It’s also totally fine to be single while you figure out what you want. There’s no rush to find “the one” – and honestly, you’ll be more prepared to be in a relationship once you know what’s truly important to you.

For a better understanding of what a healthy relationship looks like, click HERE.

Feeling Down While Scrolling or Streaming?

Here’s what you can do to keep your mental health in check when on social media:

• Take a Break: If it’s bringing you down, close the app or turn off the TV. Take a walk, chat with a friend, or do something that makes you feel good.
• Unfollow or Mute: If you’re following accounts that make you feel less than, maybe it’s time to hit unfollow or mute. It’s your feed—make it inspire, not bring you down.

What’s your favorite thing to do when you’re feeling sad to feel better?

You’re Doing Great

No relationship, online or offline, is perfect. Every relationship has its ups and downs—and that’s normal.

What matters most is how you feel about your relationships, and how you feel about yourself. You’re growing, learning, and figuring it all out. That’s exactly what you’re supposed to do!

For tips on ways to practice self-love, check this out!

For additional support, check out Get The Facts.

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